I would like to think...
...that I will be able to journal my mother's (and my) colonoscopy experience economically but, knowing me, I probably won't. It will be scattered throughout this site in a variety of formats, from Test Results to Essays to journal entries. Some of it may even end up belatedly in a history. I will try not to repeat myself and I will keep the index for Site Searches up-to-the-session dated.
    That's the most I can promise.
- posted by gail rae @ 22:23  0 comments   email...this post

 
I'm going to spend some time, tonight...
...doing some updating, moving things around, maybe some maintenance (I've been neglecting doing meta tags, for instance), and journalizing this unusual colonoscopy experience.
    We went out to eat, tonight, Black Angus; my mother wanted steak. Another good sign. She overestimated the durability of her energy and pooped out half way through her steak but she'd gorged herself on sweet molasses bread, salad (can you believe that?!?), shrimp cocktail and she insisted on a glass of wine, which always throws her for a loop because of the glipizide. She practically fell asleep at the table, thoroughly contented. We decided to take the meat home (I could only manage a third of my steak), with her broccoli (if you're not a vegetable lover from the get go, broccoli after salad is a bit much to expect) and make beef, vegetable, barley soup with cider vinegar and a touch of MPBIL's southwestern spice: American Hot and Sour.
    I rubbed her feet, marveled at her color, we joked awhile about doctors, observed and commented on and to The Girls (our cats), and by 2130 she was ready for bed.
    The first thing I'm going to do is move the Colonoscopy Instructions to a page which will also contain preliminary and complete results of the test.
    I'm circumspect on the subject of miracles. There are so many and, the more we explain, the more we discover, that it seems oxymoronic to call the unexplained "miraculous". Perhaps what is miraculous about the unexplained is that when we finally explain a miracle, that is when the miraculous begins.
    I'll be back later.
- posted by gail rae @ 22:12  0 comments   email...this post

 
To MFS: Naturally, I rarely read my messages before I send them...
...and I finally, just now, reread the message I sent you earlier and noticed that I said: "She is in the classic category of the Overmedicated Elderly..." [corrected in the online quote] I meant to write: She isn't in the classic category of the Overmedicated Elderly...". You know how I know this? You'll love this...one day when Mom and I went in for one of her appointments, it was a quiet afternoon at the office and one of the staff had patient files all over the place updating them. Each time a patient comes in for an appointment, when they leave they get a printout of their stats, which usually takes a half page, then a list of all the current medications they have been prescribed and are currently on (both over the counter and Rxed meds) and instructions. Usually, when Mom and I walk out, our printout is one page, sometimes one page with a tag line on the second page noting the time of our next appointment. MFS, most of the patients that clinic sees get printouts anywhere from five to ten pages long, most of it medications and instructions! I know this isn't because these doctors are medication happy, at least Mom's isn't, he is always circumspect about prescribing, even more circumspect when he suggests something new, he is always thrilled when I am able to cut back on medications or find an alternative (for instance, rubbing her feet and lower legs and arms twice a day rather than giving her furosemide to help her expel internal retained water, which he, earlier this year, prescribed for her everyday and I balked at).
    Anyway, I have to tell you this, too...weird, weird, weird. I decided, instead of writing the colonoscopist, I'd call her office and, even if I was only able to talk to her assistant or her nurse, maybe, with their experience, they'd be able to tell me if Mom's initial reaction to The Cleansing and The Colonoscopy were normal and which part of the entire procedure would most likely account for it. Well, her surgical assistant was there so I ran all my observations by her. She was stumped and put me on hold to consult with someone else. As it turns out, it was the colonoscopist's partner to whom she talked. Mind you, MFS, I had already told the assistant that one of the things I'd discovered is that her blood sugar was so much easier to control that I was not putting her back on the Glucophage and that she didn't appear to need iron three times a day, so far. So, the assistant comes back to the phone and says to me, "[The colonoscopist's partner] says it's the new medication she's on."
    My brain goes "!?!" My mouth goes, "But, she's not on any new medication. In fact, I've cut her medication back."
    "Well," the assistant tells me, "that's what he said."
    That's what he said?!? Hello, Ms. Assistant to the Coloscopist, is anyone home? Needless to say, I let that conversation go and will now be writing a letter to the colonoscopist.
    So, I decided to call the PCP's office. Knowing that he probably won't be able to talk to me, I expect to get one of his nurses, and do, a new, young one who is actually quite good, if somewhat inexperienced, but is definitely well versed on Mom and the way I handle her medical care. I tell The Nurse right off the bat the unexpected results of the colonoscopy and the strategies I'm putting into place because of these developments, that I will be continuing them, with severe monitoring and dogged circumspection, for the next week, and, of course, will reverse my path and do "as the doctor orders", the moment my observations and her blood sugar indicate that she either needs the iron or the Glucophage. I tell her several times, because I want to make sure she's taking notes, that I am giving this information to her to pass on to Moms PCP so that he will have some time to think about and, if necessary, research these developments, my reactions to them, call me, if necessary, to tell me to stop what I'm doing and continue with prescribed treatment, and to let him know well ahead in case he wants to order another blood draw before next Wednesday so he can see how my strategy (and/or the aftermath of The Cleansing) is working.
    Throughout the call she stops me at various places and says, "You know, I don't have the authority to authorize treatment changes," and each time she tells me this I tell her, once again, "Nurse, I'm not asking you for permission. I'm going to do these things, regardless. I'm asking you to pass on information. That's all."
    Finally, when I'm done, she launches into a strange (thank you, Neil Young) little sermon about how people shouldn't take their medical care into their own hands, blah, blah, blah...
    ...and I'm thinking, well, in that case, since doctors typically don't have enough time on their hands to take on the complete and observant medical care of all their patients, who's supposed to do this and I think further, damn, I'll bet this message is going to be so cryptic when it gets to Mom's PCP that he's not going to get the gist of it. Actually, there's a good chance that I'm wrong on that, but, you know, MFS, and I'm sure you do, the medical profession is just very, very weird, now.
    MFS, I especially wanted you to know all these medical-adventure details because I know you have a strong interest in becoming a nurse. You're a brave, brave soul, MFS, wanting to go into medicine at this time. It isn't "Your Mother's Medicine" anymore. My experience with managing Mom's health care is proof positive of this. Medicine needs people like you, older people who have experienced the ass end of medicine and still want to go into it, and I know, if you get to pursue your desire, you'll be fabulous.
    I'll keep you posted as Mom and I continue in the aftermath of the colonoscopy. She awoke from a somewhat longer than usual for the last few days afternoon nap (I took one, too, today...my exhaustion from trying to keep a constant eye on Mom finally caught up with me) complaining that she didn't feel good, "...like I have a fever without the fever...". After some probing questions and noting, mentally, that she was looking a little pale (although nothing like she'd been looking before The Cleansing), taking her temperature, asking specific questions about possible pain and discomfort, taking her blood sugar (which was normal, 98) noticing that she was a little dehydrated, I decided it was time for a good dinner (she, of course, told me she wasn't hungry), some Glucotrol, plenty of fluids and an iron pill. I got her Wendy's chili (she loves this stuff and, I don't know if you've noticed this but it tastes exactly like Mom's used to taste, which isn't the typical way chili tastes), gave her some cottage cheese, made her drink a 16 oz. glass of water, let her chase that with some of our mounds of left-over Jello, she wolfed the entire dinner down and started feeling much better. She actually pulled out of going to Costco this afternoon, but that was okay with me. She's still A Weak One, both from the procedure and from months of being almost non-ambulatory, and I expected that she would over-estimate her energy level so I wasn't surprised and didn't push her. But, just the fact that she is still, even this evening, talking about doing this, doing that, going here, going there, when are we going to Prescott, etc., well, this is the best indication to me that she is feeling better, even if she is somewhat overestimating her abilities. My job now, I think, is to maneuver between her conception of her energy and her actual strength, which is poor but I think shows excellent signs of improvement, and make sure that her personal optimism isn't overwhelmed and dashed by her current (but, hopefully, temporary) inability to do what she now wants to do.
    I am, by the way, for my (at this point) almost non-existent audience on the Mom & Me website, going to put this up without names (although I'm sorely tempted to put the names of all medical personnel just to expose the ridiculous nature of medical care, right now).
    I am really beginning to get the feeling that someday, at some point, someone who is either taking care of an Ancient One or is medically involved with lots of Ancient Ones, will see the site, read and begin to think more deeply about what they not only are doing but aren't doing.
    So, without further ado (and verbal doo-doo), I'll read this over and send it off. MFS, if you're worrying about Mom, don't. She's doing better than okay, right now, and I have high hopes, and so does she.
- posted by gail rae @ 17:09  0 comments   email...this post

 
Colonoscopy results: Benign and Normal
    The "benign" refers to the pathology on all polyps removed. "Normal" refers to the condition of her colon and includes the observation that she was not and is not bleeding in the lower section of her intestinal tract.
    These results were just phoned to me. We've got a busy day ahead. Mom is a little lethargic this morning but not nearly as much as usual. She's moving slowly but she's arguing a lot, which is good.
    More later.
- posted by gail rae @ 10:41  0 comments   email...this post

 
Since my last post...
...my focus has been primarily on my mother, and that focus has been extremely concentrated. The entire procedure, including The Cleansing, has been an odd and surprising experience. Things are going unusually well but I haven't had much time to do more than pay attention to what is going on with my mother. I expect to be able to carve out some time this weekend to post an update on The Colonoscopy Experience; there is much to report. In the meantime, know that my mother is well, tolerated both The Cleansing and The Procedure well, there have been some unusual and heartening developments, I've learned a great deal in a few days that I will be using to flesh out my essay on Doctors and Patience, and, while tired, I'm much, much encouraged by what's been going on and my determination to continue both my mother's unexpected rallying since the procedure and reporting here, in detail, is renewed, but is being pushed aside by my interest in keeping my attention honed in on Her in the Flesh, to the exclusion, for a short time, of Her in the Journal.
    If you've been following us, stay tuned. Some surprises are in store.
- posted by gail rae @ 00:24  0 comments   email...this post

 
To MFS: I'm not sure where to start.
     It's VERY strange! The last thing the colonoscopist (gastroenterologist, actually) said was: "I do not ever want to do a colonoscopy on this woman again!"
    Although I was pretty sure I knew why she was saying this, I asked her why.
    "She's 85," she said. "I don't want to torture her again." At this point Mom was still very woozy from the meds given her to relax her for the procedure, although her spirits were up and she was doing well. She fared very well throughout the procedure, as she did throughout The Cleansing. I did have to keep after her constantly to drink and drink and drink but the laxatives, while heavy duty, worked very quickly each time she took them and, although we also went to bed late because the last dose, at 2200, was as effective as the first dose at 1600 (the Dulcolax didn't actually have any effect...unless it softened her up for the next round of Phospho Soda). But by 0030 a.m. when Mom went to bed after one last push of Gatorade, although she arose twice after that before we got up to go for the procedure, it was only to pee. She stayed well hydrated, was well pinked, and was up almost the whole time, except for a one hour nap in the afternoon.
    Well, yesterday, although she was still woozy and very light on her feet (so much so that I slept just outside her bedroom again last night, half in and half out of the utility room actually), her improved alertness was so evident that when I called MCS to let her know about how the procedure went and she talked to Mom, MCS said (and I noticed as I listened to Mom's side) that Mom was amazingly alert; even more so than a short bout of alertness she had a couple of weeks ago for a little over a day.
    But, the amazing development occurred today. I was up early, and so was Mom, to pee, and, MFS, it's as though the clock has been rolled back a couple of years! She's more alert than she's been in literally, years, she's somewhat surer on her feet, and, listen to this...I have to go to Costco today, we're almost out of several staples like eggs and orange juice...and she wants to go! MFS, she hasn't wanted to go to any store with me in a long, long time, over a year.
    I'm not sure whether it was The Cleansing or the colonoscopy. She had lots of polyps, all of which were removed, as far as I know. We, of course, won't get the pathology report back for about a week, but the colonoscopist said none of them looked suspicious. I'm now wondering, if the colonoscopist knew of the amazing change that has taken place in Mom, if she would feel the same. Not that I plan to get her scoped, again. In fact, I am going to see to it that scoping from either end, or any other invasive types of testing, be kept from an absolute minimum to zero. I'm also going to write the colonoscopist a letter, today, let her know that Mom's recovery is practically miraculous and ask her if, in her opinion,

1. it was the removal of polyps or The Cleansing that did it,
2. if she thinks it was The Cleansing, would it be appropriate to do a mild version of it every once in awhile on Mom, and
3. if this changes her opinion of Mom's frailty in regards to what may be, in the future, the necessity of having her scoped, again.

    MFS, this morning our 85 year old yard man dropped by while Mom was up. I was so incredibly amazed at Mom's recovery from the last few years that I went out to let him know. He told me that the same thing happened to him about a year ago. He had a colonoscopy, had some polyps removed (not as many as Mom) and confirmed that immediately after the entire procedure, including The Cleansing, he felt "1000% better than [he's] felt in years!"
    At this point, I'm leaning toward thinking it was The Cleansing, as the colonoscopist said that although Mom had lots of polyps, none of them was interferring with her functioning. And, there was no evidence of internal bleeding in her lower intestines. She also said that she recommended, if the search for internal bleeding continues in her upper digestive tract, to confine the search to imaging tests, not to scope her. Regardless of what happens now, I think that's a good policy, but, I'm so curious about what's really going on inside her and what "did the trick".
    Anyway, MCS and I had a long discussion about this yesterday, even before the continuation of Mom's awaking from her Long Sleep. MCS suggested something we hadn't considered...that some of Mom's medication is suppressing bone marrow production. In fact, this sounds like a likely avenue of investigation to me, too. She is not in the classic category of the Overmedicated Elderly, but, for herself she could be, and my first suspect is the Glucophage. The reason I am so leary of this one is that, during The Cleansing day, as you know, just to get her to drink fluids she had lots of sugared fluids, and, as well, her PCP said not only to cut her meds in half that day but to stop the Glucophage because it is hard on the kidneys and keep her off it on the day of the procedure as well. Needless to say, I did not take her blood sugar during The Cleansing, nor yesterday before the procedure. I was afraid to. Well, the hospital took it and, low and behold, at 0815, after an evening of sugar-sugar-sugar, her blood sugar was 106! So, I'm going to try a little experiment. Beginning today, I am only going to give her the Glucotrol and monitor her blood sugar 3 times a day, starting this evening. I'm thinking that maybe, now, she doesn't need to be on Glucophage, or, if she needs something extra, maybe something else besides that.
    At any rate, the colonoscopist said try to regulate her diet for high fiber, and, MFS, when I discussed that with Mom this morning, she said, "Let's give it a try." Can you believe that?!? So, we are. I'm hoping that maybe, all in all, almost everything that has been afflicting Mom for the past several years can be taken care of through diet and the occasional cleansing.
    MFS, I'm being as circumspect as possible about all this and, of course, only time will tell, but, well, if you could talk to Mom and see her I think you'd share in my extreme optimism. Although I don't think I was wrong last fall about backing off from the colonoscopy, I don't think I was wrong, this spring, about finally allowing it, if only because it forced a thorough cleansing of her insides.
    I'll keep you updated on not only Mom's health progress, but our progress in getting up to Prescott, soon (after August 12th, I'm sure). If you don't hear from me for awhile, check in on the website, as I will be keeping that updated, as well.
- posted by gail rae @ 10:28  0 comments   email...this post

 
The Hollowing Out part of The Cleansing has begun.
    The first wave hit a little over an hour after her first dose of the Phospho Soda. It's funny because one minute she said she thought she might have to head for the bathroom soon and the next minute, just as she had started in, it was too late. We both learned a valuable lesson: When you're on laxatives, just thinking you might have to head for the bathroom is a signal that you'd better already be in there.
    About a half hour of clean-up was involved but it wasn't nearly as unpleasant as some past clean-ups have been, oddly, because the laxative completely changes the smell of whatever one is harboring in one's intestines. Since the flavor of the Phospho Soda is "Ginger Lemon", I assume that was also the aroma, although I can't swear to it.
    Mom's experiencing another wave, right now, and I'm pushing Gatorade, this time in preparation for her 2000 dose of Dulcolax, although, actually, I'm not sure she needs it, but those are the orders.
    As of this posting she's feeling good, looking good, still arguing about how much water she has to drink, and is experiencing no discomfort. We're joking a lot about the process and, here she is again, folks. Back to the ring.
- posted by gail rae @ 19:38  0 comments   email...this post

 
Mom is taking an hour nap.
    I decided that she'd drunk enough liquid (despite her protests and my continual, cautionary "Drink more, Mom,") in the last 4 hours so that an hour nap shouldn't hurt. I took the time to take a shower instead of the one I would normally take tomorrow, and update our progress through The Cleansing.
    I spoke with the colonoscopist's nurse today and had no problem getting across to her that we are most likely going to have a problem with dehydration, including giving her the details of my mother's daily dehydration index. She told me to allow her liquids until 0200 and to impress upon her that if she is not well enough hydrated when she comes in for the procedure and the crew has a problem finding a good vein for the purposes of administration of both medication and IV fluids, the procedure will be "much more traumatic" for her than it would normally be. This bothered me a little, as the story up to now is that colonoscopies are normally not traumatic. I haven't actually believed this, in regard to my mother, anyway, and have questioned it in regard to other of the elderly.
    We're on our way, though, and so far we're doing good. At 1500 I'll be guiding her into the bath, as I'm sure a bath will be impossible tomorrow before the procedure.
    One rather interesting bit of information of which I wish I'd been informed before today: It seems that broth is better than bouillon because it contains protein. Naturally, this wasn't indicated on the instructions, so I bought bouillon. But, I'm now draining all our cans of chicken for bouillon and this should do the trick.
- posted by gail rae @ 14:28  0 comments   email...this post

 
Just so you know...
    I did, this morning, after reviewing the colonosopy prep instructions once again, realize, a safe distance from Mom awakening, that she cannot have green Jello®. So, I'll save the four cups of green Jello® for the day of and/or the day after the colonoscopy. I don't think there'll be too much of a problem. Although it is a bit late for me to go out and scrounge yet another package or two of (mellow) yellow Jello®, I'll just save the bulk of the appropriate Jello for her. She isn't up yet but, just to make sure she has plenty of time to consume fluids, I'll be awakening her at 1000 this morning.
    I hope that this colonoscopy is the last of the invasive intestinal exams she'll have to endure. I understand the prep for an endoscopy, the exam which surveys the upper intestinal tract, is much the same as the prep we're going through today.
    I have recently noticed something a bit unusual. I don't know whether this is significant. Mom has had short bouts of the hiccups every day for the last few weeks. It didn't occur to me to think of this as notable until I realized that these were happening on a daily basis. The hiccups never last for more than a few minutes whether or not she takes steps to stop them (typically drinking water or eating a piece of bread). From my heightened observations in the last week or so I've noticed, too, that they happen within a half hour to an hour after she eats. I can't help but wonder if they are indicative of possible bleeding in either the upper or lower digestive tract. I guess there's a chance that we'll find out tomorrow.
    Time for me to slip into Mom's mom mode. I'll be back later to report on our progress.
- posted by gail rae @ 09:47  0 comments   email...this post

 
12 cups of Jello® are cooling in the frig, tonight.
    Mom has always liked Jello®, so when I told her the only flavors we could have were lemon and lime her response was, "Mmmmm". Something tells me, though, even a confirmed Jello® fan can get tired of Jello® pretty quickly when that's the only solid food allowed her.
    Me, well, Jello® has never been one of my favorites and my least favorite Jello®s (Jello®es?, who knows? How many people regularly eat enough Jello® to pluralize it?!?) are lemon and lime, naturally. I looked for White Grape and Cranberry. I thought I remembered seeing those flavors in the last few years but went to four different grocery stores and turned up none. One store, Bashas, a local chain, had "Mystery Jello®" (I swear this is true), a genuine Jello® product packaged in a box that looks as though it was designed for Toddler's Mardi Gras. It was on sale with a sign saying "discontinued" (I wonder why????) and it occurred to me it might be worth a try, especially on the day before a colonoscopy, but, wouldn't you know it, it had Red 40 dye in it, a no-no before a colonoscopy, as its residue can be mistaken for blood.
    I made four cups of lemon Jello® with orange carbonated water, four cups of lemon Jello® with white grape juice (that should taste plenty weird, in case either of us begins to pine for Mystery Jello®) and four cups of lime Jello® with orange carbonated water.
    I'm most looking forward to the broth; I plan to add basil, maybe oregano, I've got some thyme and fennel seeds and some sage, so that should be savory. I'm also looking forward to the clear liquid fast, especially since it's summer and it's been very hot and humid, here, even inside our house. I know, though, at some time during the day, probably more than once, Mom will automatically head to the refrigerator for cheese or look for the can of nuts. I'm going to have to be on guard all day. I can't simply allow her to sleep through it. She'll need the nutrition, the hydration and the added metabolic boost and energy that moving around a little provides for The Cleansing, which will begin at 4 p.m.
    Since I will be home all day tomorrow, I may do some updating, of sorts, here. I started a post about "Doctors and Patience" and realized it would make a better essay, so that's being polished. Maybe I can get it posted tomorrow in the Essays section.
    My mother has had a good day, today, in the less lethargic levels of 'slow'. It's been relatively exciting for her...the water was out unexpectedly for a few hours, then the battery died in one of the cars and today was a hair day. She was pink tonight, quick witted and her feet were only suffering normal been-on-her-feet swelling; her belly, none. She's remembered, all day, about the colonoscopy but is still a little confused about tomorrow. She thinks the procedure is happening tomorrow. I've been talking about it a lot over the last four days or so, just to get her used to the idea. I mentioned, as well, to MPS today that, if all goes well (possibly even if it doesn't), I expect Mom to forget the procedure within a day or two of having had it. I'm expecting tomorrow to be an intense but up day. I'm not feeling completely confident about the colonoscopy and I am downright scared about the possibilities of dangerous levels of dehydration, not to mention discomfort, during the latter part of The Cleansing. But the part of tomorrow before the laxatives start phosphorescing down my mother's pipes, I think, will be a good day.
- posted by gail rae @ 23:40  0 comments   email...this post

 
New Blood Test Results Are Up
    Damn! I missed another day!
    The new blood test results are for July 18th, a CBC and Basic Metabolic Panel taken for the colonoscopist (requested by Mom's PCP) for Wednesday's procedure. I'll post a little later but I need to apply myself to making Jello® for ass scope prep day tomorrow.
    For the record, "Not last night but the night before..." I gave Mom another 10 mg furosemide. I was surprised she needed it again so soon, so I've upped the leg rubs by one more and I'm rubbing her arms, now, too. I do believe my mother thinks she's died and gone to heaven, which is fine with me, as long as it keeps her from really going to heaven for awhile.
    Back later.
- posted by gail rae @ 20:25  0 comments   email...this post