To MFASRF: Death of Siblings, One Generation Removed
    My mother just mentioned that, "I'd sure like to spend tomorrow getting a hold of MS."
    Startled me. I didn't think before I said, "That might be a little hard, seeing as how MS is dead."
    I honestly thought it was a slip of her tongue, but her expression told me it was a slip of her mind. I decided, instead of allowing this to descend into a horrid little out of control game, I'd better catch her up, fast. MDU is dead.
    Nobody had told her, she insisted.
    One of her older cousins died last September. News to her. What about MS's daughter? Good question; last we tried her, her phone had been disconnected. I didn't add that for all I knew she might be dead. It's true, though. Her health was not good. At all.
    I remember the first few times my grandmother forgot that people were dead. I mean, really forgot, like, not being able to be reminded, it was new information, as though these people had just died.
    I shuddered.
    This morning I was exulting with the woman who barbers my hair and does my mother's hair about how Mom not only remembered we had spent Easter at MPS's, she remembered she'd had a good time and that the entree was pork roast. She decided to call MPS Monday night and thank her for having us over. MPS was so surprised that she called me back to make sure "everything was all right."
    Mom now is sitting here eating cheese. She just said, "You know, now, I knew that MS was [pause] gone." Her voice sounds like it's clouding a little. "I just didn't want to remember."
    So, now she's remembering. Wow. So, I say, "That's okay. It's not something that's fun to remember."
    "Well," she says, "I've got to."
    "Don't worry about it, then, I'll remind you."
    She looks at me like she is focusing on me, trying to remember what are the best settings through which to view me. "Well, I just hope you don't forget."
    She's staring out the window now. Her eyes aren't sugar coated, but the drape is drawn.
    So do I, MFASRF. So do I.
- posted by gail rae @ 23:29   email...this post